Floundering

I’m choking

On words I can’t say
On feelings I can’t express
On thoughts I know are ridiculous
But they still plague my mind
And fester

My hands shake
My eyes leak

And I can’t help but think
Of the panic a fish feels
The moment it leaves the water

So I’m sorry
That I’m convulsing

I’m sorry that I’m flopping around on the ground
Gasping for air
But I can’t seem to breathe
Becuase my mind has forgotten
What lungs are

And something as simple
As the casual conversations you cast out
Are enough to be the hooks
That are pulling at my jaw

For you need no bait to reel me in,
But you need to understand
That I’m not used to being submerged for this long

And if I’m going to grow gills

I need to know
You’ll swim alongside me